I confess – I’ve been too “digital” – up until now. The following questions has been running through my mind over and over: How will I do social media differently in 2012? That is such a loaded question. What I’m realizing matters most, is the value I place on relationships. Quality – not quantity. I think many of us, as we jumped on the social bandwagon in the last several years, have looked at numbers.
- How many Twitter followers can I amass?
- What’s the size of my network on LinkedIn?
- How many people want to be my friend on Facebook?
- What is my Klout score?
Those same statements can be said about any of the social network sites. I’ve been really thinking about what I need to do differently this year to really grow relationships that matter to me, and seek out new ones. I love “people.” I love the word “social.” Those two words play so well together, if done sincerely. So this year I must confess… I need to be more of me, more personal, and less worried about the numbers.
Here are few random thoughts that got me to this point:
Twitter: As I thought about my followers and who I follow, I had to admit to myself that I have not spent nearly enough time paying attention to who was following me, and even asking myself why they would. And along the same lines, who am I following that I gain value from their content and/or have developed a personal relationships with – or want to develop a relationship with. So at the risk of losing thousands of followers, I am setting out on a journey to really look at each and every person I follow, get them on a list and figure out who they really are. (I unfollowed over 700 yesterday, and will continue to clean house.)
If I have unfollowed you, and you feel we should remain connected, please tweet me. I’d love to hear from you, and perhaps reconnect.
FourSquare: This is an interesting one. I love Foursquare, and truth be told, I will probably continue using it – but I have cut way back. My husband and I were competing for points and mayorships, as we do in Yahtzee and Scrabble – we compete – aggressively… It gets ugly. But my husband is very wise and made a keen observation. If we are going out to dinner, or church, or to the store – Foursquare has a definite impact on our experience. If we are nose down to the mobile device trying to be the first to check-in or fighting for the mayorship – we are losing out on relational experiences. If I am fighting with my Android, I’m certainly not holding my husband’s hand, and we are not taking in the sights and sounds around us. So we have stopped that competition.
I will continue to use Foursquare, but more for outings like RocPeepsLunch, and a true desire to share my location for a reason – not just to let the world know where I went for lunch. Though you may see my NASCAR check-ins. Those are just fun – and we are headed to Daytona soon.
Facebook: I haven’t gone the route of cleaning house on Facebook yet. I have not started removing “friends” – but I’m seriously considering it. The number of friends I have on Facebook does not equate to value. I’m not going to mass-delete people, but what I am finding is that because I have a large number of friends, I am missing out on things that people are posting. I often hear people talking about something that I knew nothing about, and when I speak up they say – “I posted it on Facebook, didn’t you see it?” The reality is, my newsfeed is filled up with so much stuff, I often miss things. I’ve used some of the new features for filtering and labeling friends, and I don’t like them. (Personal opinion)
I do get a lot of value out of the business content I see posted on Facebook, and I really enjoy connecting with people personally, so this year I need to find some balance there. I haven’t yet decided what that will look like – but it’s on my radar. I think my Facebook Timeline layout is a good representation of me and what matters… I put a lot of thought into it as I pieced together my headline image in Photoshop. I intend to stay true to that this year and strike a balance with my social business network.
Hand-crafted and hand-written notes.
The Power of Personal: What really got me here? A friend of mine who sends out only hand-made cards. She sends out Christmas, Birthday, and “just because she want’s to send you a note” cards. I even got a hand-made Halloween card! Who sends out Halloween cards? (I loved it!) These cards keep coming in the mail, and with each one I receive, I am more grateful for the personal touch. These hand-made cards with… wait for it… hand-written notes… have reminded me of the importance of personal touch in relationships. Checking the mail these days can be no fun. Bills and junk mail (and at election time OYE) – but when there is the thought I might receive something personal, it adds some new anticipation. When I actually DO receive something personal, it touches my heart. And while she is a friend, and not a business associate – she has taught me a very valuable business lesson.
So I confess that I have lost focus on what has mattered most to me in my professional life as a Social Media Manager. I’ve been successful with social media marketing, but I think that this year I will evolve into something new and better. This year I will narrow my focus and work to build more value in my relationships. I will work to re-kindle old relationships that have fallen dormant, and will spend time seeking out new ones.
I will also be more true to my Twitter bio – which means more artichoke tweets :)
PS. I’ve decided I don’t care about my Klout score! If you find value in the things I say, you’ll follow me. If we’ve established a relationship, you’ll follow me. Not because of some random number, based on an algorithm that frankly, just does not matter. There I said it!
{ 11 comments… read them below or add one }
Completely agree. It’s about the relationships, not the numbers, and it is all too easy to get swept up into the frenzy of concentric circles and ripples–to the point where you lose touch with what matters and why we’re doing this in the first place. I applaud you not only for having the wisdom to know this, but for having the intestinal fortitude to unlike and unfollow the masses As for Klout scores–they change their algorithm more often than a Rochester meteorologist changes his forecast. I don’t put much truck in it, as we say back in Kansas.
I can totally relate to the need to downsize how large the digital lists are. I go back and forth with who to unfollow or unfriend. I connected people to my personal facebook long before I made a page on facebook for my blog. I also play silly games on facebook (and have some “friends” who I only have to play games with. I’ll hang my head in shame now.) But the list is so big I can’t keep up with the “important” people. But I also can’t figure out how to get the “blog people” to move over to my blog page. I hate the thought of losing people. And the list filtering just confuses me.
I do go through my twitter and unfollow people pretty regularly. I think it’s time for a clean out there right about now too. When it gets to be too many tweets I just start avoiding it altogether.
I was foursquare obsessed until I left my phone on a cruise ship. I had to live without my apps for a week and it seemed to totally break me of my foursquare addiction.
And real mail. Real mail is so awesome. It’s become a magical thing.
Colleen,
Thanks for taking the time to leave a comment. Since writing this I have really continued down the path of downsizing, and though I’ve reduced the number of people I follow on Twitter by about 1,000, I’ve lost less than 100 followers, but I still am not sure why people follow me. I am trying to actively engage more.
Since writing this, I also sent out one handwritten note to someone, and her response was overwhelming! I intend to much more of that this year. As for foursquare, I check in when I feel it’s important to publicize my location, or promote that business, but never when my husband and I go somewhere together, as that takes away from our together time.
The phone on the cruise ship might have been serendipity (love that word). That fortunate accident allowed you to free yourself of that habit…
Thanks again for commenting – and enjoy your day!
I definitely need to dwindle out some of those “friends” on Facebook that are making me miss important things. There are so many types of social media that I can’t keep up with everything I need to, really.
I also LOVE the cards in the mail thing. I thought about sending cards to friends this year just to randomly tell them I’m thinking of them. I love getting things in the mail that I actually WANT to see like that, so I know it would brighten others’ days.
Hey Taurus, thanks for the note. I am so appreciative of comments these days. When someone doesn’t just read something, but they take a time out to write even just a few short sentences… Because you did, I am now following you on Twitter also
I look forward to connecting with you on a more personal note and getting to know you!
Get those hand-written notes in the mail. I’m trying to commit to one a week – how hard is that???
Thank you for writing such a great blog post. You’re completely right when you say that we are far too caught up in the numbers game. Thanks to reading your post, I resolve to build on my realtionships, and not on any numbers. That’ll be far more fulfilling in the long run anyway.
I too have concentrated on numbers rather than relationships. It’s time to fall in love with social media again and renew our relationship.
One of the things that I have always done is to send thank you’s to people that I’ve worked with (yes, the one’s delivered by a postal worker in a uniform). I also send holiday cards and birthday cards!
Amanda and Zippy – Fantastic comments!
Zippy I love the line… Time to fall in love with social media again!
Amanada – cheers to fulfilling relationships!
I completely agree. A few months ago (maybe a year now?) I culled my Facebook friends, leaving only those with whom I correspond regularly. I do have a Facebook page for my blog, and of course anyone can be a fan there. I’ve also done a hard pruning of my Twitter account, unfollowing anyone who spews rather than interacting regularly. It feels good. I need to do more of it.
Trying to manage numbers on social networks is stressful and exhausting. I’ve also decided to focus on building close relationships with people who interest me and have supported me over the years. My life feels less cluttered and easier to manage.
These are such great comments – so nice to see I’m not the only one who got totally lost in the social shuffle and now seek to get back to basics!